As I stare at this shed, the representation of a new meaning, a new beginning, I imagine the life that could have been, I imagine tearing it to shreds. There, just in those thoughts alone are a confliction of my inner world.
As I shiver outside I imagine what it must be like for the poor, the unfortunate that have nothing apart from the breath that they utter, but it doesn’t make me weep. Infact it makes me think unkind things.
How did you get there? Why are you in that situation? Why do you have nothing? Surely you didn’t try hard enough?
I guess some people are oblivious to what journey they are on. I guess some are not aware that one single thought, feeling, yes, no, choice, chance sets you on a path/course.
So I guess you could say if you have a problem or a situation you are currently in, it could have been easily avoided if when the first beginnings of the situation arose you could have dealt with it then. But I guess as every life is our own why should we consider others around us. that’s why so many appear selfish but I feel that many don’t actually realise the significant some people play in others lifes. I guess its down to the individuals feelings about someone.
Its like why do I take it so personal, so angry, when someone doesn’t hear me?
The simple answer is I want them to actually hear me, to actually care.
Some could say my life is fine
Some could say my life is falling apart
But both of those opinions are based on observing points of views. No one actually asks How are you. Don’t get me wrong many people do everyday, but how many actually truly care.
Lifes infuriating, people are precious.
Lifes a choice
Clock continues to tick whatever the choice.
The heart continues to beat whatever the feeling
maybe I’m not being loud and clear here
Maybe my indecisiveness conflicts my feelings
Thousands of souls are continuously lost
Thousands go unheard
I’m just one more, why would I be any different
Life continues even when you fall out with someone
Life continues even when you lose someone
Life continues even when you are alone
What do you want from life? You are all alone
We cry, we weep, its utterly soul destroying, So soul destroying I fall to my knees. We are surrounded by people, we shouldn’t be so alone. I continue to cry and weep always on my own. No ones here to pick me up and put me on my feet. I , me, do that all alone. I continue even when I truly don’t want too. I have nothing to weep for. I have no reason to feel so depleted. I have no reason, no excuse to feel the way that I do. Its infuriating when I feel like this, which is nearly everyday, yet the sadness always out ways.
The choice is yours to live or to live
What you do everyday, what you miss out on, who you speak to
Most importantly its how you treat number one, I don’t like being number one.