Loving something

Loving something you’ve always loved is easy. Loving something different isn’t easy, its hard, sometimes difference is better than the comfort of familiarity. You’ll never know if your choices happen to be the right ones. You’ll never know if they are correct. you’ll want them to be, with all might, you’ll want your choices to be right, correct. But then you’ll never know if they are or not. Guess its the feeling. The feeling of rightness.

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Cut down the trees, axe the tree trunks. Believe in yourself, you’ll become everything. Believe in yourself, you’ll faith will shine through. Buy a cheesecake, buy a bar, consume all. Wave goodbye to past emotions, let the sadness dissipate. Everything will be okay, just smile, everything will be okay. Thrash to the beat, let the music consume soul. You’ll be fine because you are me. Flush the insides out, flush every nasty thing within the human bottle. Breathing is good, its the best, just breathe over thinking, you’ll breathe just fine.

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All I’ve wanted was to be able to let go. To confide, to love. To express and be fully me without negative dishearten thoughts stopping me from being me. Self punish myself daily, either by isolation, food, hunger, darkening thoughts. I’ve done it for years till the bottle fizzles. I just want to let go. Otherwise I’ll always be alone within my mind. The last thing I want to do is breathe in sadness. To make life in darkness. To have friends in pity. I rule my life, its not in happiness but I want it to be. No longer want the isolation. How do you connect when you’ve never connected.

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Everyday is a reset. Do you make a difference everyday or do you do the same everyday. Do you progress or stay the same. Everyday is a new life, its just easier to do the same.

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